Denial is not a river in egypt!

I felt i had to write this post to get something off my chest.

most people think that if you dont pay attention to something or just ignore it for as long as you possibly can it has no effect on you.

many of us believe that if we try to escape to some foreign suburb that we wont be affected by the plights of the inner city.

or we believe that its right to just cut off communication with someone even when we still want to talk to them.

we put ourselves through a lot of unnecessary stress trying to escape from and deny that things and feelings exist when they do.

sometimes we are able to find all types of elaborate ways of distracting ourselves from reality but in actuality that thing that you are trying to escape from has influenced your life more than you know.

lets say you met somebody at a place you love dearly.

it didnt work out and you completely want to ignore them.

you dont want to go to the same place you met them at because you dont want to bump into them

this means you have to change your whole life to avoid running into that person

so you arent really ignoring them, you are giving this person too much power (more power than they actually desreve)

aint nobody stoping me from going where i want to go.

i dont get down like that

now of course if somebody fades out of your life naturally because you are moving in a whole nother direection than ok it just happens

i go to sites all the time, "i dont want to talk to them but i dont want to make it seem as if im trying to talk to them, i dont want to initiate contact, or im a G, im trying to avoid them to prove how strong i am.

you are a fool lol

you are stressing yourself out unecessary

just call them or email them if you really want to that bad

i got caught up in that and i wound up feeling dumb because i wasted so much time because of pride (not going beneath your standards)

who created your standards

how did you come to believe what you now think is the right way to go.

always question why you have accepted a belief and measure it against reality.

if its driving you insane then maybe you might need to drop that value

theres nothing wrong with changing a belief if it no longer suits you.

you are going to waist a lot of time and energy if you dont come to terms with how you really feel.

sometimes it's good to distract yourself from doing something that you might regret

thats not always the answer though

and when you finally face that reality that you have been trying to avoid, you will thank God that you had the courage to do it.

get out of old comfort zones.

the more experiences you have the more able you will be to cope more effectively with the challenges in life.

Please God Help Me Please! Whats The Best Way To Counter The Dreaded Infestation Of Procrastination!

Im having a hard time with something.

Im writing this manual on how to cure yourself of all types of "incurable" disaeases.

Im basically giving a people a program on how they can heal themselves of diabetes, cancer, arthritis, obesity and whole host of other illneses.

Many people when they want to sell something put an ad in the paper or advertise on the radio or pass out flyers and business cards.

Im going to pass out flyers becasue i know flyers work if you pass out enough.

This is a big feat because i have to make two sales letters, one to upsell them on theinformation product another to post on the internet.

it's a lot of work because im putting in there all i have learned in natural healing from mentors and books, lectures workshops etc.

i wanna do it now because the sooner i start the faster i start making money and healing people.

how do you handle procrastination when you know you have to do something important.

my problem is i am easily distracted.

sometimes its hard forme to stay focused on something longer than 5 minutes (which is sad because i know the cure to ADHD lol)

Please Help Me Somebody

What Should I Do To Counter This!

Sorry. The White Boy Inside Of Me Really Likes These Songs.

Metalica - Master of Puppets

Heart - Barracuda

Deep Purple - Chid In Time




Metallica - One

This is why you should never ever ever drink grain alcohol!

Saturday night was a very unique one for me lol.

Im learning about herbs and their medicinal properties (healing capacity), and some mixtures require you to make tinctures.

A tincture is an herb or mixture of hebs thats mixed with a preservative to keep it in a consumable form forever.

You can mix vinegar with the herbs and yo can also mixgrain alcohol with it to keep it preserved.

So i got some liquor to go with the herbs and i went home to make the tincture (the herbs i mixed by the way were valerian, wild lettuce, loebillia and skulcap, i was making a tonic that will put you right to sleep. It didnt work though, it might work as a brewed tea though)

So i was like since i got some alcohol let me take a sip.

i cut it with some cranberry juice and for a while i aint feel nothing.

so i drunk a little bit more and all of a sudden i started to feel it.

i still kept drinking though and i felt it a little bit more.

next thing you know its 3 o'clock in the morning im drunk and horny.

its time to have a good time lol.

i rushed out of my bed making a whole bunch of noise(i rent a room in a house), i walked out the door i remember doing that.

Next thing you know it was 2pm sunday afternoon.

i had mcdonalds food scattered all around me, my cell phone was gone, my keys were gone, i had 100 dollars missing from my wallet, i had like 10 dollars in these strange looking yellow coins (which i think i got from an adult store or something lol) and i didnt remember JACK!

Well I finally got my answer today.

I went outside and talked to the guy who lives upstairs from me and we were outside talking for a minute.

He said i was immensely wet, and i was tripping hard with him like never before.

He said it was like i was a completely different person.

like the regular tubby escaped from my body and a totally different human being with a completely different personality inculcated my spiritless flesh (well maybe he didnt say it like that).

Anyway lol, we were out there talking and he said all of a sudden this fine redbone came walking down the street (he said she wasnt a dime she was a 20) and i was actually hollering at her (thats not something i ever have the confidence to do).

He said i was macking shorty hard and i just left him and walked down the street with her lol.

I guess i must have took her back to the crib because he said when he got back there there was a whole lot of moaning and groaning coming from my room.

And on top of that a lady who lives in the same building had her 17 year old kid there and she heard everything.

That's not funny man.

Dont drink please.

sidebar: this dude for a 20 dollar bet drunk a whole pint of grain alcohol STRAIGHT in only a few swallows.

That dude definately earned that twenty dollars lol.

Oh yeah, for those who dont know grain alcohol is 95% alcohol (that means if you drink that much alcohol and smoke you could litterally blow up, straight spontaneous combustion).

He was throwing up for like 2 days he said he walked all the way downtown from where we live (about 4 miles).

Please stay away from this kind of alcohol im telling you.

Just stick to wine coolers lol.

Im thinking about moving, where should i move to?

Recently i just got my hands on a good chunk of money and i feel like fleeing the state of maryland.

I feel like im too dependent on my family for help (even though i live by myself) and i feel like exploring the world to see what else is out there.

Im 27, dont have any kids, in very good shape, aint tied down to a job so where should i go and why?

I wanna go somewhere there is plenty of opportunities to make money but the cost of living is still not that high.

I would reallly like to go somewhere thats warm or at least not so cold in the winter.

can somebody give me a clue please.

Im incapable of making a decision of this magnitude for myself lol.