Monday, August 18, 2008

Do you believe in interacial dating?


I figured I'd do a post like this because i think i need to teach an anonymous blogger who tried to call me out a history lesson. I hope I don't offend anyone I'm just speaking my personal feelings about this issue. It has nothing to do with anything. But we cant forget certain historical facts or we will repeat them and we might even suffer a worse atrocity next time. The question is do you believe in interacial dating? I don't. Why? There are a number of very good reasons for this. First of all, i don't think its a problem to date someone who is mixed if they know who they are. But see this is the dilemma, harvard university did a survey on this, DNA sampling black and white students, and when the results came back most of the white people had afrikan blood in them. At least 90%. (They hated that by the way lol!) But the thing is they look off scratch white so you couldn't tell that at all if you just looked at them. To be honest i hadn't considered that point but i guess i should consider that and come back to yall but for the mean time, no lol.




And there are of course other ethnic groups out there that are heavily mixed with afrikan people even to the extent that it might be a stretch to actually call them anything but. You have other groups, indians east and west, latinos, asians that look just like us but they have straight hair and european features, but they may be darker than me or as dark as the bark on a tree. Im confusing myself now so i guess i should stick to one ethnic group, white people lol. I wouldnt date a white woman because i remember black men being hanged and lynched and having their bodies mutilated (dick cut off and stuffed in their mouths) for just being blamed for sleeping with a white woman. Even if they didn't do it. As a matter of fact if you study the history of the lynched victims (black men) you will see that at least 90% of them were lynched because white men (and white women btw check out rosewood) allegedly accused them of having a sexual relationship or even sexually assaulting a white woman. And they didn't do it by the way. And come to find out a large percentage of the men who were accused of having these affairs were business owners and the white men were just jealous of him owning something for himself.






And also, if you see the movie good bye uncle tom, made by italian film directors, many white women thought it was a form of bestiality to sleep with black men. They hated the ground he walked on, publicly lol, (some of them did sneak around but), they still had a low regard for him. And i would venture to say that this mentality hasn't changed that much in many white people. It's one thing to smile at you at work and laugh at all your jokes, its another thing to actually live amongst you and put their kids in the same schools with yours, and let me tell you the vast majority of white people don't want this at all. I digress. I just believe that if a person or a people once abused you they might do it again lol. If somebody abused me and my ancestors and went through the whole dictionary of evil in terms of what they did to us i would be very cautious in dealing with them because at any time they can turn crazy again. Like i said this is just my opinion. I could be wrong for even pondering this.


Now lets go with this from the sisters perspective. Why shouldn't black women date white men? I know im going to get a looooooooot of flack for this but i got to deal with it. Look im not saying im right. I could be wrong as wrong as can be, its just a different view of this situation that you may have not heard before. First of all, do you remember a time in history called "slavery" lol. Or a period not too long called jim crow. In both of these periods white men could do whatever they wanted to do to black women and they frequently used them in anyway they wanted. My ex has a cousin who is married to an Italian and now lives in Italy. She didn't give a black man the time of day but every white guy who paid attention to her, no matter how they look she flirted back with them. I swear i was at her house and she was talkin some smack about something and i started to say do you know how the italian mafia has treated black people. The sell them crack, cocaine and every other type of drugs almost exclusively to us. In the Godfather one of the corleons said "give the drugs to the niggers they have no souls." And i started to also say (and I know this is true) "white men have raped well over one million black women since we've been in this country and neither one of them ever got put to death for it. Her own aunt was raped by a white man and didn't tell anybody for a long time. And now you are willingly give youself freely to them neglecting your own? Your playing right into their hands!" She's a disgrace. I bet you the majority of people, if they knew the true history and counted up all of the stuff they did to us probably wouldn't go that route. I can go on and on. But I wont. But i do want to hear your opinion. Try not to be influenced by this in anyway.

19 comments:

MsFreshBananaPuddin said...

i have to believe in it or else i wouldnt be here lol

i forget how big of a deal interracial dating is until someone brings it up. in the end there is only one race, the human one.

the only thing that i hate is that when someone tries to be something they are not to be with someone. be yourself, whether its black, white or what have you.

James Tubman said...

i agree puddin

just so you know i would DEFINATELY date you lol

but i just dont think we should forget about other things that have transpired in our history as well

interacia dating has only been popular for about 40 years

for the last 400 years before that it was forbidden for this kind of dating to take place

we cant be completely over it until this government appoligizes for sdlavery and jim crow and gives us reparations for all the harm it caused us

thanx for your comment

Anonymous said...

interesting post...i say date whomever floats your boat.

James Tubman said...

i dont doubt that i or anyone else could get along with any member of any other ethnic group

i just dont see why most would want to

i mean to me the black woman is 100times better than anyone else

thats just my obviously bias opinion

Jay said...

Mr Tubman..another intriging post

Right this is what i think..i can date a white man, a yellow man, a black man...what the hell any man as long as its a man...although i am freaked out by hairy men lol lol!!

I have come to the realisation that history is just what it is and yes we black people have been through hell and back. Slavery is a scar that runs deep to our very bones. In my country there still stands forts were i bet my relatives where chained and packaged like cattle

However i remember one thing and one thing only, we are a free race now and our history although enriched with pain is also full of memories. Ones that we can choose to better us or hold on to

Have you realised that as a result of all of this a black man is steadfast( although there a varing degrees of this lol) and a black woman has the strength of an oak tree....you should already know this, esp when she is mightly pissed off :)

We are the race that can cross all races, we can date everyone,now isn't that a result Mr Tubman.

Heheheheh...ok to answer your question yes i can date a white man and if they give me any trouble well i suppose i'll just have to test his steadfastness...he better be strong enough to stand it.

Jay said...

mehn that was long...at work avoiding word :)))

James Tubman said...

i dont trust white poeple

i have white friends

i get along sometimes better with them than my own group

i still dont trust them because i know history

everytime blacks have tried to get along with whites they always tried to conquer and exploit us

every single time

that is why i think those of us who date them really dont have a good knowledge of history

im not saying that blacks cant do you wrong, but ill take my chances with them before i ever date someone else

plus if you put the most beautiful black woman against the most beautiful white woman there is absolutely no comparrison at all

think about that

M. Akamau said...

James,
This is a toughie. I hate to say it, I really do (!), but I agree with you on the interracial dating thing. That's a well-kept secret, though, and to be honest, I'm a little ashamed to admit it.

I am a Christian, after all.

It's not that I don't trust white people. I do. But yes, the history thing -- the lynchings and all the atrocities connected with it, and now it's okay and we just go on like nothing ever happened. It's still stuck with me somehow, though I would like to 'let it go', and forgive accordingly. I do acknowledge that.

Maybe I just need to get this off my chest.

We don't live in a utopia, and unfortunately I just can't embrace the 'love-will-conquer-all' mentality; there are so many other issues to consider.

When black men date white women (and they are doing so more and more), it makes me feel like I'm not good enough as a black woman (I mean this in a general sense; I'm married, so I'm not trying to hook up with a brotha who is already hooked up with a white woman). It's been enough on black women and other ethnic minorities over the years that the Eurocentric standard of beauty seems to be EVERYBODY'S standard. What does the media say is beautiful? Straight hair (kinky is way unacceptable, though it's rarely said outright), narrow hips and a thin frame. Women who fall short of this standard (and who have believed the lie that this IS in fact the accepted standard) struggle all the time with self-acceptance and self-love, though I'm sure that there are other contributing issues there, as well.

As a black woman, I feel we've been passed over for generations. We are somehow not pretty enough, not thin enough, not articulate or intelligent enough --- it seems we can never measure up to the white woman, no matter what we do, and now countless of our black men have cast us aside in order to take a white woman.

I think one of the problems is that we are mainly thinking of ourselves. Black men (and anyone, for that matter) want to be free to date whomever they want to. It's their choice. It's all about personal choice. What's best for me. This is my life, and I'm gonna live it the way I want to, yada, yada, yada. We fail to think of the history of it all. We fail to think of our beloved Afrikan sisters and what it might do to their psyche, or sense of self-worth. We usually don't think past our own selfishness, and this is probably exactly what I'm doing by saying what I'm saying and feeling what I'm feeling. You're probably the first person I've really ever admitted this to. So yeah...it's out there. I got issues.:)

Michele

James Tubman said...

i love you michelle lol

ill comment later

MsFreshBananaPuddin said...

I agree it is a very controversal issue. especially if you want to take it back that far, to slavery. When the white slave owners would rape the black slave women. Like Frederick Douglass who is mixed like me. Who later went on to marry a white woman.

Today I think the issue is more of the sisters mad that white women are taking their men and the black men giving up on their women. See, regardless it still is a catch 22.

ps- you would date me cuz im light skinned ? lol

dejanae said...

i say marry who ur heart tells u to
just be realistic about what u'll be facing
lord knows i prefer the brothers but im an equal opportunity employer.lol

James Tubman said...

@michele... i think there are unfortunately a lot more black men are dating and valuing white women more

i think its mass brainwashing

since we were young all weve seen is a european ideal of beauty

both men and women have seen this

and to be honest its kind of funny there isnt more interracial dating

i think people have just internalized the belief that whites are better

i dont know

thanx for your honesty michele

i used to think that all the women with that name are stuck up lol

not anymore

James Tubman said...

@my puddin pop... i would date you because you are lightskined (that is a part of who you are)

but also because you have a great sense of humor

you have the capability

and i think you might be easy lol

kidding

i dont think slavery was that far away

i think many whites might not have the same archaic racist thoughts they had but i do believe that many still see blacks as inferior

and i dont think the government is really concerned about improving race relations between blacks and whites

because they havent appologized for slavery and they havent paid us back

if they do that then maybe i will see them in a different light

@dejanae... equal employment lol

i think black women are more attractive (even though i dont base everything strictly on that)

i also believe that dating a white woman will mean that i have been brainwashed by the media into liking them better than my own

there are too many black women who are out there for men to go after a becky sue

im sure they have a lot of guys going after them too

thanx boo

The Ant & Mike Show said...

Interracial dating is definitely a catch 22 topic. On one hand, without it, many of us (African-Americans) would not be who we are. The thing that makes black beautiful is our ability to cover more corners of the color spectrum than any other ethnic group. From the extremely light, to the deepest shade of black, the range of colors that make African-Americans unique stems from interracial relations. On the other hand, I am in love with black women and always will be. I have a relationship and a bond with them that is so deeply rooted, I couldn't foresee ever desiring something else.

At the end of the day, I tell people to date whomever fits you, regardless of societal opinion. I'd much rather see a black person in a healthy relationship with someone from another racial ethnic background, than see two black people stretching out and hanging on to a relationship that is more heartache than heartfelt. I say love who you love, but I know with me personally, that woman will be black.

Great post though man, and Thanks for checking out our blog.

-Ant
http://www.theantandmikeshow.com
*We Do More Than Gossip*

the antipop said...

you raise and interesting issue tubman. however, i am a hopeless romantic. i believe in true love. so should the winds of love blow you that way, then just play along

Muze said...

i believe people should date whomever they please.

i don't get mad when i see a black man with a white woman, but i do have a problem when a black man says he will ONLY date white women, or anything but a black woman. i have a friend like that and i ream him about it every time i see him. lol.

i for one could never see myself seriously dating anyone but a black man. there is just something so powerful and magnificent about black men that other men just don't have. period.

but don't be mad at present day white people for slavery, james. they didn't do it. not saying you should trust them, but i can imagine some of the conversations you get into with the white people you know. poor things. lolol.

hope all is well jamesey.

ha!

James Tubman said...

as long as they live off the interest their fore fathers made by killing of others in cold blood

they dont deserve sympathy

and they will one day pay for their crimes

love you muzey lol

Cruz said...

I'm very nonchalant and could careless about what others think so I think i'd be a good candidate for interracial dating. If two people like each other, go for it. I dont see color. Unfortunately, most people in life do see color.

James Tubman said...

the problem isnt black people seeing race its a crooked cop seeing race

its the record companies that see race

its the politicians seeing race when they invest billions of dollars into prisons instead of investing that money into building up our communities

when others more powerful stop discriminating against us on the basis of race then i will